Foodies seems to love portmanteaus. Frappuccino stems from frappe and cappuccino. Spork, from spoon and fork. Turducken is a combination of almost every bird we eat—turkey, duck and chicken. And now: cronut, from croissant and donut.
Portmanteaus make sense for food creations. When the new is a blend of the old, why not let the name reflect that? Well, here’s one reason why: it sounds awful.
Cronut? Sounds like a primitive tool that archeologists have yet to catalog and comprehend.
Turducken? Does no one else see that this word starts with TURD?
But whatever. Portmanteaus aren’t going away, not for foodies, so here are a few logical predications on what the next, new food portmanteaus might be:
- Rumffin- rum-soaked muffin
- Smoagie- smoked salmon hoagie
- Ham Thai – pad thai in a bowl made of ham
- Toffries – toffee-coated french fries, very sticky
- Pancakies – pancake-flavored cookies with maple syrup glaze
- Waffuletta – muffuletta sandwich on waffles instead of bread
- Tomatigator- tomato stuffed with alligator meat, served with a garlic butter sauce (also known as gutter)
- Mustwursts – mustard brats, known for being far inferior to real brats
- Lobchup – lobster ketchup
- Sevenlayercupcakiedoughballs Pie – seven layer cake in cupcake form, made with cookie dough, and rolled into cake balls as garnish on this otherwise plain cream pie